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Italianswhat

Derrick explains what Italians are!

Super Mario Galaxy 2 for Dummies is a skit made by Mega64 for IGN. It was released on May 20, 2010.

DescriptionEdit

Take a sneak peak at the Super Mario Galaxy 2 Tutorial DVD before so you can be sure you know how to play Mario!

CastEdit

TranscriptEdit

{The IGN intro plays}thumb|400px|right

{cut to a black screen with the word "PLAY" in the upper left hand corner}

{Uplifting music plays and the logo for Super Mario Galaxy 2 appears on screen with the text "TUTORIAL DVD" }

{Fade to Derrick standing in front of a blue background with gameplay footage of Super Mario Galaxy II on the right with the text "LEARN 2 PLAY" at the bottom}

Derrick: Hi and welcome to Nintendo's DVD tutorial on how to play Super Mario Galaxy II.

{A red screen with the words "Getting Started" fades in and back out}

{While Derrick is speaking, footage of a hand putting a game disk into a Nintendo Wii plays}

Derrick: First thing you're gonna do is take your game disk, and put it into your console, shiny side towards the thicker end of the system.

{Cut back to Derrick with the blue background while the words "SHINY SIDE = DATA" "NO SHINE = NO PLAY" and "CHARACTERISTIC OF JUST ABOUT ANY VIDEO GAME, EVER" appear to his right}

Derrrick:This is standard fair for most Nintendo Wii games, but because you're watching this DVD, we're gonna assume you've never played a Nintendo Wii game before.

{Cut to footage of a copy of Super Mario Galaxy sitting next to a Nintendo Wii with the text "SUPER MARIO GALAXY 2 IS A "VIDEO GAME" at the bottom of the screen}

Derrick: But you know what, Super Mario Galaxy II is a great place to start.

{A red screen with the words "About The Game" fades in and back out}

{Fade to Derrick speaking while Super Mario Galaxy 2 game play footage appears on screen with the text "SUPER MARIO CONTROL SCHEME" at the top and "A = JUMP" at the bottom}

Derrick: Super Mario Galaxy II is a game that involves lots of running around, jumping, platform gaming, item collecting, and killing your enemies by jumping on them.

{Gameplay footage fades out and Derrick reappears on screen}

Derrick: It's pretty much standard fair for Mario games for the past 20 years, but because you're watching this DVD, we're gonna assume you've never played a Mario game before.

{A red screen with the words "Who is Mario?" fades in and back out}

{Derrick reappears with an image of Mario to the right}

Derrick: {points to right} That guy right there, that's Mario.

{Fade to a red background with Mario on the right.}

Derrick: He wears a lot of red. He's a Plumber. And he's also Italian.

{The following text appears on screen as Derrick speaks:}
MARIO
-WEARS THE COLOR "RED"
-IS A PLUMBER
(PIPE-RELATED FIXER)
-ITALIAN
(FAMILY OF ITALIAN DESCENT (COUNTRY OF ITALY))

{Text next to the word "MARIO" stating "(THIS IS HIS NAME)" and an arrow with the word "HAT" appear on screen}

{Fade back to Derrick}

Derrick: But, because you're watching this DVD we're gonna assume you don't really know what Italians are.

{fade to a red screen with the text "Italians" then fade back to Derrick pointing at images of The Situation and The Godfather on the right}

Derrick: These are Italians.

{Fade to a red screen with a screen cap from the Sopranos on the right}

Derrick:They like food with lots of tomatoes in them, and they like to build towers that kind of lean over a bit.

{The following text appears on screen as Derrick speaks:}

-Tomato-based food products
-Off-kilter tower structures

{fade back to Derrick}

Derrick: But you know what, they are very beautiful and cultured people, and because you're watching this DVD, we're gonna assume you don't even know what people are.

{Fade to red screen with the word "People"}

{Fade back to Derrick with an image of a crowd to his right}

Derrick: {points to right} Those are people. They're pretty much like the worlds smartest animal.

{The words "-Like THE smartest animal" appear below the image}

Derrrick: But you know what? We're gonna assume you don't know what smart is, {Derrick switches to a condescending voice} and that's why you're watching a DVD on how to play a Mario Game!

{The background changes to video footage of flames while heavy metal music plays and Derrick screams and does a retard motion by hitting his chest with his right hand. Footage of Rocco making retard noises and Shawn faking a seizure appear superimposed on the background}

{quick cut back to the Super Mario Galaxy 2 logo with the text "AND THAT'S HOW YOU PLAY" at the bottom while the uplifting music plays again}

{cut to a black screen with the word "EJECT" in the upper left hand corner}

{The Mega64 outro plays followed by the IGN outro}

External LinksEdit

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